Bartolo Colon is eating himself to death!

17 06 2008

Back in High School I was somewhat of a stud. I’d go to the batting cages every single day until the blisters on my hands would begin to bleed, and then I’d stay for another hour. Unfortunately, baseball is not what I do for a living.

I work in the Advertising Industry. The once washboard abs have been replaced by a hairy stomach and the power bars and visits to the gym by Taco Bell and weekend marathons of Grand Theft Auto on the Xbox360. I only wish I could have the career of someone like Bartolo Colon, who has twice won 20+ games and even a Cy Young Award.

What is hard to fathom is that the once very reliable Colon, who won 14 or more games in 8 straight seasons is just 11-15 in the past three years. It’s been analyzed and now over-analyzed but could it possibly have anything to do with the, oh I don’t know, extra 25+ lbs. he is carrying? Maybe?

Well, Colon put himself on the Disabled List earlier in the week after swinging a baseball bat. Talk amongst yourselves on that one.

Bartolo Colon is a fatass

Where have you gone, Rickey Henderson?


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4 responses

17 06 2008
Grant

Funniest. Swing. Ever.

His helmet even came flying off at one point.

17 06 2008
William Noetling

Any wonder why the Angels let him go FA two years ago? Bart had a great career until he got injured, and hasn’t been the same since that extended stay on the DL after he won his Cy-Young. Shame really, if he had been consistent after the surgery he had a chance at the hall.

17 06 2008
Gellman

This is classic. So awesome!

17 06 2008
Geo

Eat the Canseco bars. I guarantee you’ll lose weight from either the uncontrollable vomiting/diarrhea or any number of wonderful parasites that are most certainly attached to the moldy chocolate.

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