Jose Canseco to beat up his #1 fan?

(cue Rocky theme)

I, Mario Alejandro, put my name in the hat of competitors to fight Jose Canseco. That’s right, folks, Canseco’s next venture is in the squared ring and he is looking for fresh meat volunteers. The requirement? As far as I can tell, you just have to weigh 200 lbs. Let it be known, I want to fight Jose Canseco. Can you imagine how much publicity this could get, especially when the photo of me knocked out on the canvas is shown all over the Internet and I have painted on my man-boobs chest?

Seriously, this is a huge opportunity and besides, I am sure there will be sponsors giving out awards/money or some reward for getting “K.T.F.O” by a former M.V.P. Sign me up! I just hope this report of Jose hanging out with Mike Tyson is just a rumor. To anyone in the media who is reading this, find a way to get this deal done. I am dead serious about fighting Jose.

If you want to see a preview of the fight, click here for an old school video.



  1. Can I be the guy that gives you the smelling salts when he beats you within an inch of your life? Seriously, roid rage can turn you into a bear.

  2. Yo Gellman. LMAO
    U are absolutely right. I want to see Mario laid out on a youtube video.

  3. I’m next in line after he K.Y.T.F.O.

    I’m running at a lean, mean 315 these days (yea right, real lean).

    You could probably fit in 3 inch lettering across each of my pecs (read man-boobs)

  4. Back in 1990 a complete unknown went to Tokyo to fight the undefeated, undisputed champion of the world Mike Tyson and left with his belts.

    This could be it all over again!

  5. Well, $5,000 for six minutes’ work isn’t bad. Part can cover your hospital bills, the remaining ten dollars can be put into your eBay account.

  6. I think Screech is available for sparing.

    This is funny. Good luck and see how much Golden Palace will offer.

  7. The bad part is, if you decide to take him on, you cant kick him in the junk when it gets bad – tylenol sized balls are tough to hit.

  8. Well…In the picture he kinda looks like Arnold from Conan the Barbarian. I’de take the $5,000..maybe I can outrun him??

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