Kapler returns to baseball, promises to wear clothes

Do a Google Image Search for Gabe Kapler. I dare you. I made the mistake of doing so in a failed attempt to post a decent baseball photo and found myself bombarded with one half-nude photo after another. Yes, my real name is Mario but that doesn’t mean I want to be the next Perez Hilton.

That being said, it is good to see Gabe attempting to comeback to baseball after what will be two years away when Spring Training rolls around but I don’t know if he is a good fit to have around a young, impressionable future Home Run King, Prince Fielder. While his name was not mentioned anywhere in the Mitchell Report and he has denied taking any kind of steroids in the past I just don’t know if I believe him. In today’s Juiced Era, that is only a fair stance to take.

If at some point Gabe did cheat to get an edge, it certainly did not work…unless his goal was to be featured on countless magazine spreads without his shirt on. Sorry, Gabe it’s already been done. Anyways, in 9 seasons Gabe has never hit more than 18 home runs and driven in 72 RBI. What is worse is that in 2004 he played in 136 games and hit just 6 long balls. In his final two seasons, he played in 108 games and hit just two homers. So, maybe he’s not the best power hitter but if he can make the Brewers roster and keep his average up and strikeouts down, they sure could use his bat in the line-up. It might not be as glorious as appearing in Men’s Journal as the next Mark McGwire, but I have a feeling being a platoon player on a team full of future superstars is not the worst thing Gabe Kapler could be doing. This is.


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